There will always be someone trying to drag you down, no matter what you do. People love to hate. I don’t know why, but they do. I have found this to be especially true in regards to fitness, and social media makes it easier to be the recipient of hate than ever before. For a while, I let it bring me down and I questioned if it was worth it to continue on the path I was on, but over time I have realized that I live this lifestyle because I love it and it makes ME happy. I do not go to the gym to make anyone else happy. I do not count my macros to make anyone else happy. I do not post on social media to make anyone else happy. Those things make ME happy, and that is enough.
As a “fitness influencer”, I have dealt with a lot of negativity in recent years, both from people I know in real life and from strangers on social media. Here are 10 truths that have helped me stay true to myself, deal with negativity, and remain focused on my goals:
1. You can never please everyone
You will always be “too much” of something for someone: too skinny, too muscular, too strong, too involved, etc. You will never, ever, make everyone happy, so just do what makes YOU happy.
2. People only hate on those who are doing better than themselves
Think about it: have you ever been a recipient of hate from someone who is doing better than you? Negativity towards others generally stems from insecurity, jealousy, or bitterness that is completely unrelated to you. The bottom line: don’t take it personally.
3. Misery loves company
If someone is unhappy with himself/herself or where their life is headed, the first thing they will do is try to bring others down with them. All you can do is brush it off and respond with positivity and kindness, because they probably need it.
4. Own your achievements
It’s okay to be proud of your progress, despite what some may say. Whether you worked your butt off to set a new personal record or lose 10 pounds, you deserve to feel awesome about it and share the news if you want to!
5. Don’t let haters be your motivators
They deserve no credit for your success and you shouldn’t rely on anyone but yourself for motivation. True, long lasting motivation comes from within!
6. Focus on the positive
Whatever you focus your energy on is what will grow, so emphasize the positive! Whenever you catch yourself in a negative mindset, make a conscious effort to shift gears.
7. Those who matter will support you
While my family and close friends have always been supportive, I went through a big shift in my social circles once I really found a passion in fitness. While it was hard to grow apart from some people, I have gained even stronger connections with others!
8. Find your circle of support
You can’t expect everyone to understand your passions, hobbies, and goals. The fitness lifestyle is not for everyone, but there are plenty of people out there who DO understand and are supportive of it. Find those people and build a circle that encourages and supports your fitness efforts. Hint: you’ll most likely find those people at a gym! Don’t be afraid to make some new friends.
9. Strike a balance
It isn’t ALL about you. Doing what makes you happy isn’t about being selfish. In fact, feeling fulfilled and satisfied with your life enables you to fully love and support those around you. I’m not saying you shouldn’t be kind and generous and supportive of your loved ones. I’m saying that you should be all of those things to yourself AND to your loved ones.
10. Know Yourself
Be confident in your goals and the path you are taking to reach them! Some people may not agree with them, but do not waiver and go confidently in the direction you choose.